I spent most of my afternoon yesterday praying instead of writing.
On one hand, I wanted to write. But I felt like I needed to pray more than I needed to write. (Which is part of the reason this newsletter is arriving later than normal.)
Later on, while my family was getting ready for bed, I had some worship music on. I saw a video of Kathryn Kuhlman titled something about how she learned to hear the voice of God.
If you aren’t familiar with Kathryn Kuhlman, she was a legendary and colorful Pentecostal preacher. Her ministry was notorious for healing and the presence of God.
Of course, if you’ve been reading any amount of time, you know, anything in the “hear God’s voice” category is in my wheelhouse. I clicked on it immediately and the video started.
Immediately she began talking about the moment everything changed for her. It wasn’t at a large meeting with lots of people. Or with music. Or anywhere you’d expect.
She said, when her life went from ordinary minister to an explosion of the presence and power of God....
... it was because of an ordinary moment.
In the silence of solitude she whispered to God, “I give you all of me.” (Or something like that.)
As soon as she said that in the video, I felt it. It hit me.
Because I know exactly what she’s talking about.
Dream - Say Goodbye To Eric
Immediately, God reminded me of a dream I had 4 years ago.
In the dream, a good friend of mine, who is a pastor in real life, came to me. He said, “You should go to Stuart. But if you do, say goodbye to Eric.” I wrote about this dream and how I thought at first it was Stuart Florida. But the Lord used that dream to teach me about becoming a steward of the mysteries of God. (That’s a whole different subject.)
The specific part of the dream that God reminded me of yesterday was this...
Say goodbye to Eric.
Suddenly, I saw something in a different way. The deeper realms of God aren’t accessible by working your way into them.
The only way is surrender.
Because something in you has to open up. Something in you has to relinquish control.
According to the dictionary, surrender means...
to yield (something) to the possession or power of another
to give up, abandon, or relinquish (comfort, hope, etc.).
To give possession of your life and relinquish the control and comfort of it. This is why Paul said he counted it all as loss.
When you get to the end of yourself. Your plan. Your way. Your dreams. And your strength. When you realize that there’s nothing you can do and no where you can go.
You simply surrender.
I believe that this Christian walk is filled with little opportunities of surrender. Sometimes daily opportunities.
Surrender your life to follow Christ.
Surrender your mouth and ability to say whatever you want.
Surrender your negative thinking for the thinking in God’s Word.
Surrender bad emotions that aren’t produced from God.
And more.
There is an art to surrender.
It’s not just words. It’s not just a song we sing in church.
It’s giving everything.
And somehow God is really good at bringing you to the place where you are hemmed in. A place where you are can’t do it yourself. Where you don’t have the strength, finances, connections, etc.
Then what do you do?
You surrender.
Say goodbye to Eric.
I told God yesterday just like I’ve told Him countless times before, “I surrender.” But what I said after is, “I don’t know what it looks like. I don’t know how to do it. But You can have it all.”
I’m not sure what it is or what it takes to surrender all. What is that line a person has to cross? I can’t say. But deep inside the heart of each of us, it’s there.
For some, surrender is easy.
For others, surrender is losing everything.
Until next time,
Eric
P.S. There are topics a whole lot more fun to talk about. But this topic of surrender is where a deeper place of intimacy with God is found. On the other side of surrender is embracing the presence and power of Jesus.
Scripture Verses To Stand On
Philippians 3:7-8
7 But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ.
8 Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ,
John 10:15
15 As the Father knoweth me, even so know I the Father: and I lay down my life for the sheep.
Matthew 16:24
24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.